Wednesday, June 2, 2010

Probation (three word Wednesday - budge, nimble, theory)

More from the ongoing series involving several recent 3ww installments. I have decided to label the series "The Cortez Case" until something a little flashier comes to mind ha ha. Enjoy!

The echo of casual, loitering footsteps against a concrete floor augmented with their approach. He lifted his head away from the fist supporting it. Stop here, stop here, he thought. The pudgy guard with the closely shaven Mohawk ceased shuffling before his cell. The guard paused silently, letting suspense grow in the prisoner.

Fuck you Lars. Are you here for me or not? Quit screwing around. The prisoner knew better not to prod the bulky guard. Lars would refuse to budge for several minutes if he thought it would unnerve his audience.

Lars the guard retrieved his keychain, “Raul Thomas. Come with me.”

“About time.”

Lars smirked, revealing the gap where a front tooth had been, “Your boyfriend is on the way. We got somethin’ for ya, a goin’ away present.”

Lars led Raul around the corner from the cell block and down a series of halls. He gripped Raul by the nape to halt him and rapped on a door.

“Enter,” a stern female voice responded from inside.

Lars turned the knob and used Raul’s face to push the door open, throwing him to the floor inside. The guards on either side of the woman in the lab coat rushed to restrain Raul. She circumnavigated Raul, pinned to the cold floor. Lars closed the door behind him, folded his arms, and displayed his stupid incomplete smile.

“Good day Monsieur Thomas. I understand you have an arrangement with some people in high places.” The brunette woman squatted and rolled up his right pant leg.

“Who are you?”

“My name is not important. Just call me Doctor if you need to call me anything.” She rolled down his sock. The “Doctor” revealed an electrical device attached to a brace, and commenced fastening it to his ankle.

“Some GPS I take it?” Raul expected this would be happening. They were not going to release a known criminal from their custody without some means of tracking.

“GPS, yes, we’ll go with your theory...” She wore a condescending smile as she clicked the ankle piece into a secure lock and removed a small luggage-sized key. She fixed her glasses and stood upright.


The guards restraining Raul pulled him to his feet, then retreated to the Doctor.


“What? Are you kidding?” Raul looked to the Doctor against the left wall. Lars’ flying fist connected with his exposed cheek. He tumbled backwards but bounced to his feet just as fast.

“Come on punk, I know you got fight in ya!” Lars taunted, stepping forward.

“Too bad for you, that’s the only hit you’re gonna land,” Raul assumed a defensive martial position.

“We’ll see ‘bout that,” Lars propelled a right hook… dodged. Raul sidestepped a left jab and elbowed the guard’s ear. Lars staggered to the side and growled. He spun and lunged, Raul chopped the guard in the throat. THWAM… how bad Raul wanted to… THWAM… hit this jackass of a guard… TWHAM… for so long. Underestimating his nimble opponent, the guard collapsed to the floor wheezing.

Raul turned his vision to the Doctor and her companions. The guards readied for his approach. The Doctor calmly removed a tiny remote from the pocket of her lab coat and pushed the middle of three buttons.

“GGGGGYYYYYYYAAAAAAHHHHHHHHH!!!!” An intense surge from Raul’s ankle paralyzed his leg and dropped him to the floor, “What the fuck? I cannot feel my leg!”

“No worries Monsieur Thomas. It is only temporary. You will be fine. Feeling should return within a few hours,” she gave the familiar condescending smile. Raul rolled on the floor, hitting his right leg to test it for reaction and getting none. He was too absorbed to notice the knock on the door.


A brown haired man in a suit walked in, followed by a red haired teenager in Capri pants.

“Why are we in a prison? I thought we were going to get your partner,” the girl complained.

“Could you just be quiet for a minute?” The man in the suit attempted to silence her for the hundredth time.

“Agent Hunt,” the Doctor approached and surrendered the small remote device to the man, “Your partner is ready. We are releasing him to your full control. He may be somewhat sore and grumpy for awhile, but it shall pass…”

“Thank you Doctor,” Agent Brian Hunt helped Raul to his feet. Sweating and gasping, Raul observed the impatient teenager. In unison, Raul and Savannah pointed at each other, “Who’s this?”


  1. Another tight and gritty instalment. Excellent. And ending with another lead in to the next.

  2. Makes me want to read more, to find out why Raul would partner with anyone.

  3. This one is more grittier. I like it.

  4. I'm hooked. You made the action real, and you brought the characters to life with very few words. Keep 'em coming!

  5. A lively, well-paced interaction between and among a motley collection of blunt characters!

  6. Great action and story telling. I have a feeling Raul is going to be favorite character! But still wanted more Savannah.


  7. More great characters in the mix! I love it. I really hope you keep this going. I'm having a lot of fun following it.

  8. i love this kinda stuff... it is good to see more ongoing stories on the prompts...

  9. ooh. this was real fun. nicely done! :)